Blog Archives

Twitter Weekly Updates for 2012-05-27

  • Are the longer version of words (ie., refridgerator vs. fridge) disappearing, to end up like jeep? Are we regressing to grunts & head bobs? #
  • All these expectations are making me thirsty. #
  • I'm sure that putting a diaper on a one year-old is akin to putting a diaper on a really pissy octopus. #
  • Hummus and feta-garlic (emphasis on the garlic) sauces made for tomorrow's dinner. Add pita and slow cooked pork (plus tomato and cucumber) #
  • Can one be "hard of thinking?" #
  • Wishing my seniors good luck on their senior boards today, I'm sure you guys will knock it out of the park. #
  • No doubt these boys are my sons, they just spent 5 minutes head-butting the wall and laughing about it to each other #
  • Very proud of my seniors, all of which passed their boards. It might be boastful, but they were some of the best in the building today. #
  • A very happy 1st birthday to my two favorite little dudes, Owen and Parker. We sure live you guys! #
  • A very happy 1st birthday to my 2 favorite little dudes, we sure love you guys! And kudos to us for surviving mostly intact. #

Twitter Weekly Updates for 2012-05-20

  • http://t.co/aRlnkvT8 I started the fire, but it was the teacher's fault the school burned down. #WHS #
  • Apparently being obvious, blatant, and repetitious doesn't necessarily get the point across. #
  • Apparently Parker has has been holding hands with a younger woman (6 mo.) while on walks at day care at the high school. Such a playa. #
  • Quote of the night, "What's a puppet turd?" #
  • You know it's going to be a good day when you've made two perfect over-easy eggs. #
  • A marathon day with my 7 favorite people, 4 favorite dogs and one favorite birthday girl… Though, I'm happy to be out of the car. #

Twitter Weekly Updates for 2012-05-13

  • You know what they say, if you've got an itch, scotch it. #
  • Just completed a 2.01 mi run with @RunKeeper. Check it out! http://t.co/d4zidv2d #RunKeeper #
  • Slow-cooked apple-vinegar pork sandwiches with some sloppy slaw. #
  • Yes, I think 5:35am is the best time to get up and play. #
  • What this meal is missing is more beaver scent gland? http://t.co/borhCwcf #
  • Apparently Woodburn High is on fire. 4-alarms, which is better than my GPA there. http://t.co/17rgSmTB #
  • Finally crawled into bed…. only to have Jess find a big lego block and I found the hard plastic ball with the middle of my back #

Twitter Weekly Updates for 2012-05-06

  • That popping sound you heard right before first period? My pants. Not a good omen for the week. #caseofthemondays #
  • 4.15 miles ran after school today. Still battling numbness with a side order of calf cramp! #
  • Just posted a 4.15 mi run with @RunKeeper. Check it out! http://t.co/3sfHXIco #RunKeeper #
  • Anyone need wearable ID? Just got one for my running/biking at http://t.co/8eANLrjV feel free to use my coupon: ThanksChris13870111 @roadID #
  • is expedia making a collection of washed up almost-beens in their ads like Molly Shannon and @michaelianblack? #
  • Ever see the movie, The Never Ending Story? Yeah, my day was nothing like that, thanks for asking. #
  • A little post-run, pre-bed hour-long nap to get me ready for the evening. #oldfart #
  • I'm amazing today, no task can be done directly, must meander through every possible other non-important task first. #focusisforsuckers #
  • …seriously… spitwads? #
  • I keep mistyping my name as chorizo, maybe it is a sign. #
  • The answer is: $1128. What is the correct question? #

Twitter Weekly Updates for 2012-04-29

  • According to the my 'stamp tramp' equivalent sun burn, I should probably sew my shirt on to the back of my pants when working in the yard. #
  • Always a good start to 7th period: http://t.co/lKYHl2cC #
  • Exercises in futility never seem to work the right muscle groups. #
  • The twins had their first Take Your Child To Work Day experience by stopping in during 2nd period. We made stinky faces and saying, "duck" #
  • The other day I was told that Andrew Luck was my doppelganger. Maybe I should start my identity fraud business. #goodluckwiththat #
  • Conn. high school claims record for most twins http://t.co/79YihOsT And I thought CGHS was ripe with twins #
  • Can something have a 'futilitrian' use? #
  • Rockin' my Sat. night like old school, seriously, like a grandma making lasagna and chicken pot pie for the week. #offthehizzy #

Twitter Weekly Updates for 2012-04-22

  • The twins' classical music that plays when they're sleeping always reminds me of Civiilzation III. #
  • I'll be here with 2 of my favorite people in the world: Tickets | A Prairie Home Companion with Garrison Keillor http://t.co/ofs0PtZo #
  • Owen says: xcqsxvgd cvbc #
  • Mmm, turkiyaki meatballs and rice for dinner. #
  • Play along: Book title, followed by "in your pants" example: The Exorcist #inyourpants #
  • On The road #inyourpants #
  • The Hunt for the Red October #inyourpants #
  • The Joy of Cooking #inyourpants #
  • How to Make Friends and Influence People #inyourpants #
  • Waiting for Godot #inyourpants #
  • As I Lay Dying #inmypants #
  • Where's Waldo #inyourpants #
  • There's rampant mooing coming from the twins' room. #
  • Contrary to what half of my freshman quiz answers say, Romeo did fall in love with Lady Montague at first sight #hismombyanyothername #
  • 11.5 hours of uninterrupted, unabashed, unadulterated sleep by the twin-folk. Now if I could get myself to bed before 11pm…. #
  • Came out too fast on my first mile, under 9:30, finished up a hard 3.5 miles. #running #
  • Just completed a 3.74 mi run with @RunKeeper. Check it out! http://t.co/kBDYbrEF #RunKeeper #

Twitter Weekly Updates for 2012-04-15

  • Tonight's menu: Pepper Grilled Salmon, Rosemary Bread, twice baconed potatoes, and veggie medley. Brandy bread pudding to follow. #
  • Apparently the twins' diaper, tie & bunny ear outfits were cuter on them for Easter than on me today at work. #DoTheseEarsMakeMeLookFat #
  • Dear son, when I'm cleaning your genitals in the bathtub, I'd appreciate it if you'd keep your feet off my forehead, it'll make less weird #
  • MMFlint No, this is walkin' http://t.co/WeVowm5B #
  • Our long national nightmare is over: http://t.co/VjKx9uut #
  • Post announced today it's latest tasty cereal creation: Hex Mix. #awesomeifitweretrue #
  • OK, just became a Francouer Fan, not the Royals though: http://t.co/bCMGZma0 #bacontuesday #
  • my systolic can beat up your diastolic. #
  • Owen just gave us his first unprompted sign, it was for more food, he must take after me. These guys are so smart, they must take after Jess #
  • I haven't seen this movie, but I'm assured that it is the best movie ever: http://t.co/Ah29rvRl #2headedsharkattack #
  • Shark vs Crocosaurus seems like a logical result for looking up Shakespeare plays. #TwoSharkCrossedLovers #CrocosaurusIsSuchSweetSorrow #
  • What do you think Q-bert is doing right now? #

Twitter Weekly Updates for 2012-04-08

  • Not a good sign: Finally back in the classroom after 3.5 months off… can't remember when my prep periods were. I have 7 of them, right? #
  • Headlong back into the fray. #gottadowhatyougottado #
  • The boys were dropped off at childcare today, took them about 10 minutes to tell us to go, they didn't want us to embarrass them. #
  • My first class starts in 5 minutes. For the last 3 months, I'd be putting myself down for a nap after a big warm cup of coffee #
  • Baby sighting: I can see the twinlings playing outside my window. Cruel world. #
  • For the son of my dad's friend: I donated to Jason's cancer treatment fund http://t.co/YetQezko #
  • Beyond tired, but glad to be back at school. I guess it's a good sign if a couple of kids pick you up and carry you down the hall. #
  • Day 2 daycare drop off quote: "Dad, please leave before the ladies get here." #
  • Slept wonderfully last night. Up with the boys this morning only to fall asleep with Owen their room… apparently not wonderfully enough. #
  • Can you get a tombstone written in Comic Sans? #NeverTooEarlyToPlan #
  • Ask not what your country can do for you, ask how everyone else in the country is screwing you out of what you want. #OldSpeechesUpdated #

Twitter Weekly Updates for 2012-04-01

  • After a couple teething-induced "rough nights," I feel like I've got the 'thousand hour stare" #mykingdomforanap #
  • 'Twins' Sequel 'Triplets' in the Works for Arnold, DeVito…and Eddie Murphy http://t.co/AJwy0X1B End of times or best of times? #

Twitter Weekly Updates for 2012-03-25

  • My last Monday of #paternityleave #
  • Islay? Don't mind if I do. #
  • Everywhere I go, I find that I'm shedding puffs and scrambled eggs #paternityleave #
  • 2 hour delay for South Lane School District. #
  • No school in CG. http://t.co/z2fwFfZs #
  • Hour 6 of no power, thankfully we have 40lbs of ice for baby food and milk. #snowwaytogobutup #
  • 10 hours without power. Babies are going nuts without their iPods and Ps3 #sweatpantparade #atleastsarcasmdoesntrequirepower #
  • After 14 hours, we're back in the 21st century… And we're still talking to each other. Thanks, @EmeraldPUD #
  • Newest residents of the garbage after 14 hrs in a warm fridge: bbq beef, chk pot pie, coleslaw, & many others #thingsthatshouldntbelukewarm #
  • The ones down here were decimated by the wet snow. Doesn't bode well. #
  • And like that, my little adventure is over. #paternityleave #