About a month before the school year started, I was informed by a text message that I had been drafted into the Staff Mustache Race. As Knutson said, “there are no winners in a mustache contest”; here they were on the last day of ‘stashness:
Yes, that is a month’s worth of lip hair growth on my face. Yes, I know it’s barely visible. Yes, it is bald in the middle. Yes, I am ashamed.