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I tried to give you consolation

I think that Mother Nature and the weather channel are out to get me. No, not in the mob-style, sleep with the fishes type of way. Rather, they conspire to erode my hope, my resolve, my dreams… of a snow day.On Monday, the heavens opened up around third period dropping massive white chunks of promise of a no-school Tuesday. Yet, by fifth period, the sun was out at full capacity. However, this didn’t deter my hope, I took this as a sign of things to come, plus, the weather channel had been listing Friday morning as a snow/rain mix. My optimistic tendencies took hold of me, whispering in my ear that snow in the morning is going to be at least a two-hour delay. At least.

The last two days have brought below freezing temperatures, but no snow. I was still banking on Friday and in turn a four day weekend. The relative lost ark of teachers. Yesterday, the weather channel upgraded Friday from the snow/rain mix to a pure snow shower–I was at full excitement for my first professional snow day. Get out the toboggan.

This morning brought in even lower temperatures, yet it was horribly dry. The static electricity attacks me with every one of my movements. And then, this morning, the final fate… the weather channel broke my heart. “Partly cloudy on Friday.” We’re going to be within arm’s length of zero degrees and all we can get is a little bit of clouds. What about the cold front bearing down out of the Gulf of Alaska? What about dropping inland snow levels? The snow? The four day weekend? All hogwash.

Even though I know that when I take Moose out into the freezing cold at 5:30 tomorrow, into that frozen morning, with the grass crunching under his paws… I know that under partly cloudy skies, I’ll be at work.

But in the future, when I’m under the blistering summer sun during football practice, when my skin is akin to that of a ripe roma tomato and I pray for those partly cloudy skies to save me from the melanoma-rich sun but I know it’ll never come… where will that partly cloudy day be?

Robbing me of a snow day in February.

 

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I need to move my spirit, but I don’t know where to start

Welcome to the new year. The beginning of my year was initiated through ice, snow, and general slush. Speaking of which, I found out how emasculating it is to have your car get stuck in the snow and slush. The testosterone leaves your body even quicker when a group of neighbors come out to help you get your car back into your drive which was never more than six feet away. After the flying slush, unwanted down-hill movement, and a pair of extremely wet shoes, I was still stuck at my house in Eugene. Luckily, it was Pratt’s car that got stuck, so my masculinity is still in working order. Thanks to our New Year’s experience, we finally found a downside to living in the hills. Of course, that was the weaker of winter storms I had to endure. Since the start of the new term was coupled with three days of ice, I was trapped in my house for each of those days. Thankfully, I am an experienced in-doorman (as Garrison Keillor would say) and boredom was dealt with on am around-the-clock basis.

Which brings me to my next point. The University is stupid. Out of the three Universities south of Salem, Oregon was the only one open–and I think it was open for ego’s sake. They had the mantra of “we have students who live on campus, therefore, we are not responsible for those students who live off campus.” This just seems like they are actively putting students, staff, and faculty as risk… not the smartest move, if you ask me. But you didn’t. I have only been to my Agnes Stewart Middle School only once, so far. As of right now I am completely unsure of what this term will bring, as far as teaching goes. I’ll just mask my fear… I hear pre-adolescents can sense your fear. What happens if they approach me, and I supposed make myself look big and not run away? Is that middle school students or bears? Totally random: I just had a flashback of Mr. Bowen’s health class my sixth grade year, where we had to read through a book about adolescence… and it was narrated by Bill Cosby. weird.